Monday, September 1, 2008
What have I done for you lately?
As the online editor for a web site of a decent-sized newspaper, I'm well aware that in order to boost traffic, you need frequent updates containing compelling content. Since my last post was over three weeks ago, it seems I am failing.
I can give all sorts of excuses: I've gone out of town, I've spent too much time at work, my back hurts, there was the Palm Springs Short Fest (where I spent at least 16 hours), I've been busy impregnating various members of the Palin family, etc. But they are just excuses. The real reason for the lack of quality timely content at briandearth.com is laziness. Sloth. Sluggishness. Ennui.
So I can say I've posted something recently, here's where I'd most like to be right now:
It's the shore of Lake Wakatipu in Queenstown, New Zealand. Believe me, you'd like to be there too. it's so much better than where you are right now.
Posted by Brian at 10:59 PM
Comments (1)
Category: Random
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Click it for tickets
When buying tickets for the Dodgers-Brewers game next Sunday at Dodger Stadium, I went online and saw that left field bleacher tickets were $11. Clicked "Continue" and got shuttled off to ticketmaster.com to seal the deal.
At checkout, each of the three tickets received an additional $4.25 "convenience" charge, which, of course, pissed me off. You know what wouldn't have pissed me off? Left field bleacher tickets going for $15.25 each. If the "convenience" charge were built in, I'd buy the tickets anyway and be none the wiser. See, I want to go to the game, and if I see that tickets are $15.25 each, I would pay it with no complaints. But if I see tickets are 11 bucks a pop, and at the last second, you slip in an extra charge equivalent to another full ticket, that annoys the crap out of me.
There also was a $4.10 order processing charge. As it's Ticketmaster, this was to be expected.
Finally, you choose how you want your tickets delivered. If you pick Will Call, you stand in line for half an hour to pick them up. If you go with TicketFast, you print them out at home and skip the Will Call line. So that's what I chose. That option costs $2.50 even though it causes neither Ticketmaster nor the Dodgers to expend any resources at all. The Will Call option, which would involve an actual employee earning actual money to hand me the tickets, is free.
Also, I have petitioned all sports leagues and the federal government for years to enact a law refunding your money if your favorite team loses a game you personally attend. I will continue to fight for this legislation despite the financial hardship inflicted upon the Savannah Sand Gnats and Denver Broncos franchises.
- Posted by Brian at 3:04 PM
- Comments (3)
- Category: Rant
Monday, August 4, 2008
At least I've never been jabbed with a pen
Deborah pointed me toward notalwaysright.com, a site that gathers often-hilarious, sometimes baffling accounts of customer service attempts gone wrong. So far, this one's my favorite.
My best personal WTF customer service account came when I was working as the online editor at The Island Packet. The newspaper printed a opinion piece by Andy Rooney from a wire service. This is a condensed paraphrase of an e-mail exchange between myself and a reader:
Reader: Please send me Andy Rooney's e-mail address.
Me: You can contact Mr. Rooney via the "60 Minutes" section of the CBS web site.
Reader: No, it will be answered by a secretary, and he'll never see it. Give me his personal e-mail address, the one he checks at home.
Me: Sorry, but we don't have that. We just pulled one of his columns from the wire to fill space.
Reader: Don't give me that crap. Andy Rooney's column was in your paper. It didn't just magically appear there. I'm sure you got it from him over e-mail. I need his e-mail address.
Me: Sir, we're a tiny little paper in South Carolina, 1500 miles away from New York, Mr. Rooney's column came over a wire service we subscribe to. One of the editors saw it and used it. We never contacted Mr. Rooney during any of this so I don't know what his e-mail address is.
Reader: That's bullshit! Give me Andy Rooney's personal e-mail address RIGHT NOW or I will call your boss!
Me: andyrooney@hotmail.com
Reader: THANK YOU! Now was that so hard?
- Posted by Brian at 9:45 PM
- Comments (3)
- Category: Funny
Thursday, July 31, 2008
California didn't fall into the ocean ... this time
Debz just chastisted me for not blogging about the earthquake on Tuesday.
We had an earthquake. The building shook for six seconds. No one was killed.
When I did a Google News search for "california earthquake" just now, the top results were from the geographically relevant nytimes.com, seattlepi.com and some pissant little paper in Arizona before degenerating into links, mostly from international sources, about how a taping of Judge Judy was interrupted by the quake.
Ah, the golden age of journalism.
- Posted by Brian at 11:14 PM
- Comments (2)
- Category: Media
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Maggie Gras
Yet another triple digit weekend + Maggie's birthday (a.k.a. Maggie Gras, and she does celebrate for two weeks) = A trip to the beach. This time, it was Hermosa and Manhattan.
Unlike the previous weekend's journey to Newport Beach, during which the waves were like docile slow-moving turtles, Hermosa Beach offered a more challenging surf.
The resulting disabled list: A near-drowning (Jason), a couple sprained (or maybe jammed) toes (Maggie), a jammed (or maybe sprained) finger (Debz) and a hyperextended knee. That last one was mine. I'm not actually sure what happened to it, other than it hurts, although I can walk on it. I just chose hyperextended over sprained or dislocated 'cause it sounds more impressive.
Lesson from Maggie Gras: We're effing old.
- Posted by Brian at 9:12 PM
- Comments (1)
- Category: Travel
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Back from the beach
During the summer, when it's 115 degrees in the desert, we look for any excuse to bolt town. Andy and Liz were in Newport Beach. In Liz's family's beach house. So it didn't take a lot of arm-twisting to get us there. The beach house is on the left, the one that looks like a brown barn. Brown oceanfront barn.
This was the last hurrah for Andy and Liz before they ship off to their next Foreign Service post in Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia for the next three years. Added bonus: Going to see "Mongol" with two people who actually understand Mongolian and could point out all the shortcuts in the subtitles. Lazy Americans.
I did feel kind of bad frolicking in the surf all day Sunday while poor Debz was cooped up inside because of some medicine she was on that warned to avoid sunlight. We'll just have to go back so she can enjoy it more.
Thanks so much to Andy, Liz and her family for their hospitality and a great weekend.
- Posted by Brian at 11:24 PM
- Comments (2)
- Category: Travel
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Sedona
We're safely back from the Fourth of July weekend diversion to Sedona, Arizona.
The town's slogan - "Summer's hot but it's cool in Sedona!" - is PR spin at its best. It's summer. It's the desert. It's hot. And under construction. But it is stunningly beautiful, much like our fellow Sedona tourons, Chris and Betsy:
We also pilgrimaged to Tempe's most famous landmark: the Circle K where "Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure" was filmed.
Although we may not have visited the correct Circle K. On different pages, IMDB.com lists it at the corner of Hardy and Southern (where we were), Hardy and Broadway and Hardy and University, all in Tempe. Thanks to the magic of Google Maps' Street View, I have learned that there is a Circle K at each intersection. Bogus.
- Posted by Brian at 9:49 PM
- Comments (4)
- Category: Travel
Friday, July 4, 2008
Happy 10th birthday
A shout out, please, to Mr. Slam and Robin on their 10th birthday. We celebrated by giving them a new litterbox (affectionately known as the Poop Palace) and enough catnip to choke an ox.
Our big present to the cats is leaving them the hell alone for the extended holiday weekend, as we're off to cooler climes: Phoenix. (Phoenix's forecasted weekend highs are a mere 105, rather than the 113-117 for Palm Springs.) We will be reuniting with Chris and Betsy. Chris and I will play our favorite game from South Carolina: Say Things That Make The Wives Angry. We'll also go see some landmarks around Tempe from the movie we watched last night: "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure.". Chris and Betsy don't know this yet.
- Posted by Brian at 9:22 AM
- Comments (3)
- Category: Kittens
